Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Friday is my last day of work. Two more shifts and I officially go from "employee" to "grad student." It's weird and wonderful and finally starting to feel very, very real. I was accepted back in October, and it's been life-as-usual since, so I'm only just beginning to really, truly wrap my mind around all the impending life changes. Because our actual move date is June 27th, I get a lot of A month off! How great! comments. And though I'm enormously grateful to be able to excuse myself from the workforce well in advance of starting grad school, June is going to be a doozy: Kiddo graduates from high school (with all that entails); sorting through, eliminating and packing up all of our belongings (downsizing!); participation in a neighborhood yard sale (so.much.work); finishing up that intensive online course due before orientation. Oh, and that little thing of driving a cat, a kid, a car and a moving truck across the country.

What I'm saying is, it's a lot. Equal parts overwhelming and exciting. (Mostly exciting!)

A couple times I've wondered if I should have left my job a couple weeks ago, then realize these trains of thought I engage in are pretty darn irrelevant. An unwise use of bandwidth, quite frankly, because at this point it is what it is and there's no use imagining otherwise. So.

Just to recap, mostly for my own benefit: I've been waiting for this so long. Sooooo loooong. I went back as an undergraduate student at the ripe old age of 28. I had an elementary schooler, a husband, a house and a dog. Since that time I've graduated, researched, moved across the country, and worked my tail off. It's been a long road—quite bumpy at times—but an invaluable one. In January 2017 I attended a soul-crushing interview and questioned everything. Just a few months later I picked myself back up, applied elsewhere, and was accepted into my pipe dream program. Little old me is going to a Top 3 school! And I didn't have to sacrifice a thing: the faculty/staff are the best, my cohorts are diverse and interesting (lifelong friends will be made, no doubt), and we get to live in the one region we've yet to explore. This was absolutely meant to be. (All of it.)

Leaving our friends and the PNW as a whole is sad for sure, but the new opportunities before us are absolutely amazing.

Here's to enjoying the next month.

To taking things as they are.
To letting the little (and big) inconveniences/annoyances/worries go.
To tackling one task at a time and doing it well and to completion.
To carving out time for myself, no strings attached. (Because it's not selfish to enjoy life.)
To spending lots of quality time with Kiddo. (Sans homework or chores or other parenting drags.)

I will let go of the relationships/items/emotions that aren't necessary or mutually beneficial.
I will commit to scheduling time for self care like I would any other appointment.
I will date my husband and make my marriage a top priority.
I will use up that pottery studio punch card (and finally make that perfect pho bowl!)
I will say yes to every opportunity to have drinks with the ladies.
I will do more things that make me happy. (And not shy away from things that challenge me.)

I will act the way I want to feel.

Let's do this, June. 

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